A couple days ago I went to lunch with the man who “got a call” and had to run out twenty minutes into the date. I’m not sure I mentioned this about him, but we have interacted before. As in, we dated back in 2007, before I met the Narcissist.
This is the man that has been dubbed “Houdini” because of his uncanny ability to disappear in an out of my life. For a few days he will be blowing my phone up with text messages, then will disappear for a month, only to show back up again. There is a pattern- he will want to text, he will try to sext but I will shoot him down (disrespectful!) he will want to go to dinner/lunch/breakfast, then after having a meal together, vanishes until he finds time to text me again.
I think I have figured Houdini out. He is a man who likes the idea of me, but isn’t actually ready for someone like me. Not that I think I’m special. By that I mean someone who is “grown up.” Has children. Who’s life doesn’t revolve around going to the gym, mall, and out to bars. He likes that I am his equal financially, and respects my drive, but he’s just not ready to accept my lifestyle and I’m not sure he will ever be able to.
Will I respond the next time Houdini texts? Maybe. But maybe not. I’m not sure I need to expend my energy on that kind of person anymore.
Especially on someone who runs out on a lunch date.